Yes, it’s that time of year again….

drunk-on-table

Yep, currently it’s that fallow period between Winter and Summer and, like most of us, yer thoughts are turning to the Summer vacation.

Long lazy days spent on the beach tanning various bits of yer bod that ordinarily never even see the sunshine. Reading a book that you bought at the airport that you really don’t give two shits about but were in the holiday mood so bought it anyway. Making sure you get your full quota of alcohol, cos yer damn well paid for it even though it was advertised as free, and yer now stuck with yer head down the toilet at three a.m wishing you felt alright just as yer stomach wretches painfully and your best mate  mutters unhelpfully, ‘Maybe those Vodka Sardine Cocktails weren’t a good idea hun’.

So, why? Why go through all that crap? Cos yer having a good time? You and I know a holiday normally consists of a lot of expense, heartache getting there and subconsciously editing the events of the two weeks so that you come back telling yer friends ‘Yeah we had a fab time, the beaches were to die for and the food….Jeez it was so tasty….The food here is rubbish by comparison…..’

When in reality you hated the hotel, almost got killed by a drunken cab driver and had sex with a total stranger who you now hope was the opposite sex but you were too plastered to recall properly now yer sober……….

Ok, it’s an exaggeration, but there is a grain of truth somewhere in all of the above…

The point is, don’t feel pressurised by the media and all the other bullshit, and it is bullshit, into thinking the only holiday you have to have is the one where you spend thousands going somewhere hot.

Most of us start moaning when the weather is hot for more than four days so why the f@*k would you spend thousands to go somewhere for fourteen days where the sun is so hot it melts the tarmac and makes the sand so hot you can barely walk on it?

Most of us work hard and figure we deserve a holiday, and we do….but on our terms and when we want.

Have a great holiday ………….just buy the ‘thank you for looking after me while I was sick in that alleyway’ present for your best friend now, rather than later.

Choose yer words wisely,

 Abe & the Elum

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